The Washington Post's "Style Invitational" asks readers to take any
word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are some
Foreploy: any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
Doltergeist: a spirit that decides to haunt someplace stupid, such as your
Giraffiti: vandalism spray-painted very, very high, such as on an
Sarchasm: the gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient
who doesn't get it.
Contratemps: the resentment permanent workers feel toward the fill-in
Coiterie: a very VERY close-knit group.
Impotience: eager anticipation by men awaiting their Viagra prescription.
Reintarnation: coming back to life as a hillbilly.
Inoculatte: to take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
Hipatitis: terminal coolness.
Guillozine: a magazine for executioners.
Suckotash: a dish consisting of corn, lima beans and tofu.
Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad
vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like a serious
bummer, ya know?
Glibido: all talk and no action.
Vaseball: a game of catch played by children in the living room.
Eunouch: the pain of castration.
Deifenestration: to throw all talk of God out the window.
Hozone: an area where women of the night hang out.
Acme: a generic skin disease.
Dopeler effect: the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.
Intaxication: euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until
you realize it was your money to start with.
Newtspaper: the Washington Times.
Nazigator: an overbearing member of your carpool.