You Might Be a Jewish Redneck If ...

	1. You think that marrying your first cousin is not only permitted, but 
		biblically mandated

	2. Your home is mobile and your sukkah ain't

	3. You have a gun rack in your sukkah

	4. your idea of Shalosh Seidos is a six pack of beer and some Redman

	5. Ad Lo Yoda applies just about every night.

	6. You think KKK is a kosher symbol

	7. You speak more English than your shul president

	8. You light Shabbat candles from your cigarette

	9. The only plant in your home is your lulav

	10. The only area on your lawn that is mowed is the spot where you burn your Chametz

	11. Your idea of bathing is using the mikvah

	12. Your siddur lists the Sabbath greeting as : "Shabbot Shalom Y'all"

	13. Your Shabbat suit was a blue light special at K-mart

	14. Willie Nelson sang at your Bar/Bat Mitzvah

	15. Your local scribe shoots his own parchment

	16. You've ever used the theme to "Rawhide" as a tune for the Kedusha

	17. You've ever fired a shotgun at the sound of Haman's name

	18. Your belt buckle is bigger than your Yarmulke

	19. You give Ma'aser from your spittoon

	20. A tish just ain't a tish without a bugzapper

	21. You've ever called the "Psychic Friends Network" to answer a halachic question

	22. When you hear the shofar on Rosh Hashanah, you let your hunting dogs loose

	23. You know what Barach to make when you see a UFO

	24. Your Rabbi ever yelled "Yee-Haw" during his sermon

	25. You think the mechitza is an Italian food

	26. You think a hora is a high priced call girl

	27. You keep a can of spray paint in your Tallis bag

	28. You wear a white hood for Havdallah

	29. You know which brand of grits have an acceptable Kashrut supervision

	30. If your Omer counting calendar has ever come up with three cherries in a row

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