The Ribbon Salesman

Abraham is an old Jewish guy who is a yarn merchant. He lives next
door to the biggest anti-Semite in town.

One day the anti-Semite calls up Abraham and says, "Hey Jew!!!... I
need a piece of orange yarn.  The length must be from the tip of your
nose to the tip of your penis, and I want it delivered tomorrow."  Abe
says, "OK".

The next morning the Anti-Semite is awakened at 7am by the sound of
running engines.  He runs outside to see a row trucks lined up one
after the other, dumping truckful after truckful of orange yarn in his
front yard.  Soon his yard is a 5-foot deep sea of orange yarn.  Abe
then presents a bill for $18,000 to the anti-Semite.
The guy starts yelling and screaming at Abe.  "What is this, Jew?
This is not what I asked for!  I told you I needed a piece of yarn
from the end of your nose to the tip of your penis.  Look at this
place!  What do you have to say for yourself?"

Straightfaced, Abe replies "I'm very careful when I deal with people
like you, that's why I got a few witnesses here with me.  I may be off
by a few miles, so I gave you a 2% discount; but the tip of my penis
is in Poland."

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