How to Photograph a Puppy

	1. Remove film from box and load camera

	2. Remove film box from puppy's mouth and throw in trash
	3. Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle
	4. Choose a suitable background for photo
	5. Mount camera on tripod and focus
	6. Find puppy and take dirty sock from mouth
	7. Place puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera
	8. Forget about spot and crawl after puppy on knees
	9. Focus with one hand and fend off puppy with other hand
	10. Get tissue and clean nose print from lens
	11. Take flash cube from puppy's mouth and throw in trash
	12. Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy's nose
	13. Put magazines back on coffee table
	14. Try to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over your head
	15. Replace your glasses and check camera for damage
	16. Jump up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and say, "No, outside!
		No, outside!"
	17. Call someone to help clean up mess
	18. Fix a drink
	19. Sit back in Lazy Boy with large, strong drink and resolve to teach
		puppy"sit" and "stay" the first thing in the morning

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