Joke Invoice
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ITEMIZED COSTS
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Multiply each category by the number of jokes you like / year
(e.g. If you like 75% of our 300+ daily jokes, then multiply by 225)
1. For each joke which cause a smile
Number of Jokes you like = _____ x $.05 / joke = _________
2. New Friends Gained
Now that you know all the jokes, you are the
life of the party. But you canıt value friendship,
you say, Guess again.
New Number of Friends = ______ x $.02 / joke = _________
3. A. New Girlfriend / Boyfriend you met
by exchanging jokes you got from us
If one $.10 / joke = _________
B. If more than one, then you really owe us big time
Multiply the number x .10, add one and take it to the
nth power, where n = number of
new girlfriends or boyfriends
$(1+(n x.10)^n / joke = _________
C. New Spouse. (Hopefully only one here)
$1.00 / joke = _________
4. Stress Reduction
If you laugh everyday, you will be healthier
and have lower medical bills $ .02 / joke = _________
5. Improved Work through Stress Reduction.
Here, your company has to pay - since we
help lower stress in the workplace,
build camaraderie, and our jokes are
one of the main reasons that people show
up in the office everyday $.10 / jokes = _________
According to the IRS Humor department,
(what an oxymoron) this is tax deductible
Note: According to the International Monetary Fund
Internet Humor is directly responsible
for 1.4% of the worldsı Gross National Product
TOTAL TO BE ADDED PER JOKE = _________
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COST
DEDUCTIONS
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Now multiply the following by the number of jokes you didn't
like on an annual basis or times whatever criteria is listed.
These are your deductions to account for any pain and suffering
we have caused or discounts for being a good jokester.
1. Reduction for jokes that make you groan - $.01/joke = _________
2. Abused by your boss - $.02/joke = _________
OK, so some bosses just donıt get humor
(If they donıt, please have them see the
Work improvement section above)
3. Lost a girlfriend/boyfriend - $.05/joke = _________
becuase you spent too much time reading jokes
4. Lost a Spouse - $.25/joke = _________
(You should have read our disclaimer that jokes
are addictive)
5. If you have submitted joke to us,
- $.01 x number of submitted jokes = _________
6. If you have submitted
OUR own joke back to us Here, ADD back $.25 / joke = _________
7. If we have run your joke - $5.00 x number
of jokes run = _________
8. You spend the entire night reading our archives
and miss the next day of school or work. - $.02/joke = _________
9. Bonus for each joke you forward to
at least 10 friends and family. - $.02/joke forwarded = _________
10. Teachers find you reading jokes in class $.01 / joke = _________
The Joke is about the teacher $.03 / joke = _________
TOTAL TO BE SUBTRACTED = _________
TOTAL DUE = Itemized Costs - Itemized Deductions
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PAYMENT
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For those of you who are low on your deposit with us, Please submit
a retainer for US $5,000.00 payable in Dollars (All varieties), Marks,
Francs, Yen, Shekels, Peso, Gold bars, Microsoft or Intel Stock.
(Sorry No Apple stock accepted.)
For Indonesian, Malaysian, Korean and Thai currencies, please submit an additional 50% of the above to cover the estimated devaluation during
the 2 day bank wire period.
Funds should be transferred directly to one of our accounts in
Grand Cayman, Belize, The British Virgin Islands or Guernsey
(Itıs amazing at the correlation of good banking centers to great
SCUBA diving, isnıt it - Weıll skip scuba diving in the Channel)
NOTE:
Payment can only be made one day a year - on April 1st - APRIL FOOLS