Joke Invoice


	=================
	ITEMIZED COSTS
	=================
	Multiply each category by the number of jokes you like / year
	(e.g. If you like 75% of our 300+ daily jokes, then multiply by 225)

	1.  For each joke which cause a smile     
	    Number of Jokes you like = _____ x $.05 / joke = _________
    

	2. New Friends Gained
	   Now that you know all the jokes, you are the     
	   life of the party. But you canąt value friendship,
	   you say, Guess again.  
	   New Number of Friends =  ______   x $.02 / joke   = _________

	3.  A.  New Girlfriend / Boyfriend you met
	    by exchanging jokes you got from us
	    If one                               $.10 / joke = _________      
   
	    B.  If more than one, then you really owe us big time
	    Multiply the number x .10, add one and take it to the
	    nth power, where n = number of 
	    new girlfriends or boyfriends  
        	                       $(1+(n x.10)^n / joke  = _________
	    
	    C.  New Spouse. (Hopefully only one here)  
        	                                 $1.00 / joke = _________
  
	4.  Stress Reduction               
	    If you laugh everyday, you will be healthier        
	    and have lower medical bills       $  .02 / joke  = _________

	5.  Improved Work through Stress Reduction.
	    Here, your company has to pay - since we
	    help lower stress in the workplace, 
	    build camaraderie, and our jokes are
	    one of the main reasons that people show
	    up in the office everyday             $.10 / jokes = _________ 
	    According to the IRS Humor department, 
	    (what an oxymoron) this is tax deductible
	                                                           
	   Note: According to the International Monetary Fund
	   Internet Humor is directly responsible
	   for 1.4% of the worldsą Gross National Product
	
	   TOTAL TO BE ADDED PER JOKE                           = _________ 
	 
	================
	COST
	DEDUCTIONS
	================

	Now multiply the following by the number of jokes you didn't 
	like on an annual basis or times whatever criteria is listed.
	These are your deductions to account for any pain and suffering
	we have caused or discounts for being a good jokester.
	
	1.  Reduction for jokes that make you groan   - $.01/joke  = _________ 
	
	2.  Abused by your boss                       - $.02/joke  = _________ 
	    OK, so some bosses just donąt get humor
	    (If they donąt, please have them see the 
	    Work improvement section above)
	
	3.  Lost a girlfriend/boyfriend                - $.05/joke  = _________ 
	    becuase you spent too much time reading jokes
	
	4.  Lost a Spouse                              - $.25/joke  = _________ 
	    (You should have read our disclaimer that jokes 
	    are addictive)
	
	5.  If you have submitted joke to us,  	
	                         - $.01 x number of submitted jokes  = _________ 

	6.  If you have submitted 
	    OUR own joke back to us   Here, ADD back $.25 / joke     = _________ 
		
	7.  If we have run your joke - $5.00 x number 
	    of jokes run                                             = _________ 
	
	8.  You spend the entire night reading our archives
	    and miss the next day of school or work.   - $.02/joke   = _________
	
	9. Bonus for each joke you forward to
	   at least 10 friends and family.    - $.02/joke forwarded  = _________ 
	
	10. Teachers find you reading jokes in class $.01 / joke     = _________ 
	    The Joke is about the teacher            $.03 / joke     = _________
		
	TOTAL TO BE SUBTRACTED                                       = _________ 
	
	TOTAL DUE = Itemized Costs - Itemized Deductions
	
	=========
	PAYMENT
	=========
	For those of you who are low on your deposit with us, Please submit 
	a retainer for US $5,000.00 payable in Dollars (All varieties), Marks, 
	Francs, Yen, Shekels, Peso, Gold bars, Microsoft or Intel Stock.
	(Sorry No Apple stock accepted.) 
	For Indonesian, Malaysian, Korean and Thai currencies, please submit an additional 50% of the above to cover the estimated devaluation during 
	the 2 day bank wire period.
	
	Funds should be transferred directly to one of our accounts in
	Grand Cayman, Belize, The British Virgin Islands or Guernsey
	(Itąs amazing at the correlation of good banking centers to great 
	SCUBA diving, isnąt it - Weąll skip scuba diving in the Channel)
	
	NOTE:  
	Payment can only be made one day a year - on April 1st - APRIL FOOLS
	





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