Why a Ship Floats
This is a true response to an exam question:
Q. A cruise ship, made up of tons of steel, is able to float on water.
Steel is much denser than water, so how is it that ships of enormous
size are able to float?
They can't float. Remember the Titanic. Anyone who pays $3,000 to go
on a boat for a week with a bunch of people they don't know deserves
the cruelest form of death available. Slowly sinking to the bowels of
oceans in their contemporary Hawaiian plaid shorts as god takes the
burden of life away from those who are not fit to observe it. Perhaps
the only force allowing remote floatation is the plethora of bombs
strategically implanted in the hull of the ship causing a massive
upward thrust to counteract the weight of their inconclusive
stupidity. I sit back with my Miller High Life on the cusp of the
island and watch and I think what a waste of explosives and steel and
40 year old women who peak to the bottom of their fat heart-burned
husbands sexual pendulums at the bottom of their swing. It does not
get any better than this.
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