By Jeff MacGregor

      Welcome to the LoveMaker! (v3.1 Erosoft Industries, (c) 1993)

 At the prompt, please enter your response.

 I am the LOVEMAKER.  A personalized, interactive poetry assistance
 program.  What is your name?


 What a nice name, JOHN.  You must be a man.


 How nice for you.  Who is your poem for, JOHN?


 How nice for SHEILA.  She must be a woman?


 SHEILA must be very special to you, JOHN.  Is she?


 What is the occasion, JOHN?


 SHEILA is a very lucky woman.  I will need information about SHEILA
 for a poem that best reflects your deep feelings for her, JOHN.  
 What color are her eyes?


 Thank you, JOHN.  But could you be more specific?  Are they blue
 like the sky after a clearing storm?  Are they the icy blue of the 
 far flung fjords, shrouded in mist and mystery?
 Are they the steely blue of Walter Gropius's later Bauhaus
 sketchbooks?  Are they a cornflower blue that speaks of Sunday
 picnics in simpler times?


 Thank you, JOHN.  What about SHEILA'S hair?


 Thank you, JOHN.  But could you be more specific?  Is it ash blond
 with some auburn like the silky tresses of Rapunzel?
 When the sun hits it in a certain way in the late afternoon does it
 look like spun gold?  Is it the hard, cheap blond of the streetwise
 trollop or the dazzling, brilliant satin of Renaissance cherubim?


 Thank you, JOHN.  Are there any other characteristics we should
 mention in our poem to SHEILA?


 JOHN, are you still there?


 Thank you, JOHN.  But could you be more specific?  Is it fine and
 alabaster and tightly grained like antique porcelain, slow-fired by
 master craftsmen? Or is it pink and lustrous like the hand-burnished
 silver one's Grandmother might be found polishing with gentle,
 loving strokes on a rainy Sunday afternoon?


 SHEILA must be very special to you, JOHN.  You must have deep
 feelings for SHEILA to write her a special VALENTINE'S DAY poem.


 How nice for you, JOHN.  What kind of poem do you think SHEILA would


 My MENU (Alt+M) offers the following styles.
 At the prompt, please choose ONE:
| Couplet  | Triplet  | Quatrain | Eclogue  |  Pastoral |  Sonnet  |  Elegy |
|   Epic   |  Ballad  |  Lyric   |   Ode    |  Idyll    |  Haiku   |   ???  |


 That's O.K., JOHN.  How do you see yourself?  Please choose ONE:

|  Laureate   |    Bard     |   Sonneteer   |   Troubadour   | Meistersinger |
|  Jongleur   |  Versifier  |  Rhapsodist   |    Lyricist    |    Other      |


 Can you be more specific?


 Perhaps if you briefly shared your innermost dreams and desires,




 May I make a suggestion, JOHN?


 Perhaps you imagine yourself a hopeless romantic, JOHN.  A man who
 lives and loves with passion and desire and appetite.  A man who 
 grabs great platters from the groaning board of this world and eats
 his fill.  A man who takes what he wants the moment he sees it and
 makes it his own.  A man who kneads fate in his strong hands, shapes
 it and commands it.  A man with a reckless bent and the courage of
 fire.  A man who sees beauty in a raindrop and all the truth of the
 universe in the eyes of a child. A man with needs and wants aflame
 within him.  A man of power and means of influence, JOHN.  A man
 destined to be the envy of other men.  A man that few can ever
 understand and fewer still will have the guts to love. A man of whom
 it might be said...

 Would that Alexander in his age had but half the measure of his
 strong stout heart or clear hawk's eyes undimmed and true, pooled
 with azure purpose.  No earthbound mortal he, but master o'er each
 and all...

 Would this describe your self-image accurately, JOHN?


 I thought so.  I'll use my random SEARCH MODE (Alt+S) to choose an
 appropriate style for you, JOHN.  One that truly expresses your 
 deep feelings for SHEILA on VALENTINE'S DAY.

 Please wait...

 To print poem, please enter command Alt+P at prompt.


        Dear SHEILA,

        Roses are red
        Violets are blue
        Your hair is blond
        and your eyes are gray (when angry)


 Thank you for using LOVEMAKER v3.1 from EROSOFT

Collective copyright 1997 JokeMaster  All jokes digitally remastered

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