You Might Be a Generation X-er if ...


You wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that folded up 
into a pouch you could wear around your waist. 

You owned a Jordache pocket book (or several of them), or you remember 
when Jordache jeans were cool. 

In your fifth grade class picture, you're wearing an Izod shirt with 
the collar up. 

You were afraid of the Sleestaks on Land of the Lost. 

You know, by heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song. 

The Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories. 

You remember the first time "Space: Above and Beyond" aired - it was 
called "Battlestar Galactica". 

You ever rang someone's doorbell and said "Landshark". 

Three words: "Atari" "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar? 

You remember the days that hooking your computer into your television 
wasn't an expensive option that required gadgets - it was the ONLY 
WAY to use your computer! 

You remember the days when "safe sex" meant "my parents are gone 
for the weekend". 

You remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV. 

You ever owned a pair of "Pop-Wheels" - that handy little combination 
of shoe and roller skate that lasted about a year on the open market. 

A predominant color in your childhood photos is "plaid". 

You see teenagers today wearing clothes that show up in those 
childhood photos, and they still look bad. 

While in high school, you and all your friends discussed elaborate 
plans to get together again at the end of the century and play "1999" by 
Prince over and over again. 

You remember when music that was labeled "alternative" really was. 

You, yes you, sat down and memorized the entire lyric sheet to "It's 
the end of the world as we know it". 

You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini-van. You rode 
in the back of the station wagon and you faced the cars behind you. 

You've ever conversationally used the phrase "Jane, you ignorant 
slut". 

You watched HR Puffenstuff as a child, but now that you're older, you 
really understand that it would have been much better had you known 
about drugs at the time. 

You've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following 
phases: 
- "When I was younger" 
- "When I was your age" 
- "You know, back when..." 
- "Just can't (fill in the blank) like I used to" 

Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the 
English language. 

You're starting to view getting carded to buy alcohol as a GOOD 
thing, and you're ready to marry the next person who cards you when you 
want to buy cigarettes. 

You ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran Duran, 
Madonna,or Cyndi Lauper video 

The first time you ever kissed someone at a dance came during "Crazy 
for You" by Madonna. 

You remember with pain the sad day when the Green Machine hit the 
streets and made your old Big Wheel quite obsolete. 

The phrase "Where's the beef?" still doubles you over with laughter. 

You read the "Hot Video Games Player's Secrets" guide for Mortal 
Kombat just so you could find the hidden screen, and play Pong again 
for old time's sake. 

(guys) Your first erotic dream occurred to thoughts of Jeannie, Marsha 
Brady, Samantha from Bewitched or, for those hardcore comic fans out 
there, Daphne from Scooby Doo, Josie or any one of her Pussycats. 

(girls) You thought Sean Cassidy was "dreamy", lusted after "Ted, your 
ship's photographer" on the Love Boat and Chachi, or, to keep it fair 
to the comically interested, thought Fred was just a hunk on Scooby Doo. 

This timeline appropriately describes actual events in your life: Star 
Wars opens, you are still in single digit ages, and you think the 
creatures are WAY cool. Empire Strikes Back opens, you are now in early 
double digit ages, and you are convinced that the special effects 
much better, the characters are cool, and you want one of every
collectible out there. Return of the Jedi hits the theaters...you are now a
teenager and you cannot get your eyes off Princess Leia's breasts or Han 
Solo's butt. You fantasize forever and ever about it, and send off to join 
every fan club for them on the planet, hanging posters, photos, and 
"teen"-type magazine spreads all over your walls and lockers at school. 

You've ever shopped at a Banana Republic or Benetton, but not in the 
last five years, okay? 

You're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affect YOU) that 
maybe having the kids go to school year-round wouldn't be such a bad 
idea after all. 

You're doing absolutely nothing with anything pertaining to your major. 

Going to keg parties no longer involves hiding out in the woods when 
the cops show up. 

You ever wanted to be gagged with a spoon. 

U2 is too "popular" and "mainstream" for you now. 

You ever used the phrase "kiss mah grits" in conversation. 

You remember trying to guess the episode of the Brady Bunch from the 
first scene. 

You spent endless nights dreaming about being the Bionic Woman or 
Wonder Woman or the Six Million Dollar Man. 

You had ringside seats for Luke and Laura's wedding (on General 
Hospital). 

You remember "Hey, let's be careful out there". 

You're parents wanted you to attend medical school, but you decided 
it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes, anyway. 

You know who shot J.R. 

This rings a bell: "And my name, is Charlie. They work for me." 

You ever wanted to learn to play "Stairway to Heaven" on the guitar. 

You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on, after all, look at
Tab. 

You know all the words to the double album set of Grease. 

You ever had a Dorothy Hammill haircut. 

You sat with your friends on a Friday night and dialed 
"8-6-7-5-3-0-9" to see if Jenny would answer. 

"All-skate, change directions" means something to you. 

You owned a pair of Rainbow suspenders just like Mork used to wear. 

You bought a pair of Vanns and wanted to order a pizza in history 
class so you could be just like Jeff Spicoli in Fast Times as 
Ridgemont High. 

You owned a preppy handbook. 

You were too young to go see the Blue Lagoon so you just had to 
settle for second hand reports. 

You remember when there was only "G, PG and R", none of this PG-13 crap. 

You learned to swim about the same time Jaws came out and still carry 
the emotional scars to this day. 

Wonder twin powers, activate . . . form of a an iceberg, shape of an
eagle. 

You remember when your cable TV box had the three rows of numbers 
and you had to move the selector switch accordingly. 

You ever actually tried to turn on a jukebox by hitting it twice and 
saying "heeey". 





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