15 Things You Can Learn From Babysitting 8-year-old Boys
By Emily Dehl
1. Anythings can be used as a gun. _Anything_.
2. Commercials are to be memorized. Any words that can be changed from
harmless to insulting, do it. Examples: Big Bad Beetleborgs can
be changed to Beetlebrats, Beetlegeeks, Beetledorks, etc.
3. All things equal.
4. One Popsicle does not equal one piece of cheese, as one small slice of
chocolate cake does not equal half a mussmelon.
5. Any problems of characters from action adventure cartoons are to be
laughed at, even when Batman is hit over the head with a chair by
Two-Face.
6. There are an infinite number of different guns Legos can be made into.
7. The point of every basketball game will quickly evolve from getting
the ball through the hoop to hitting your opponets, as well as
teammates, with the ball as hard as possible.
8. They will argue for tackle instead of touch football despite the fact
that one of the people on the other tea, is 100 pounds heavier and
a foot and a half taller.
9. One bowl of cereal will quickle multiply into three bowls of cereal.
10. They will go out in the rain specifically to play baseball, and come in
when it stops.
11. Mud appears magically.
12. Mud does not disappear magically.
13. They have invisibility powers at the swimming pool. Now you see them,
not you don't.
14. The difference between 3 feet and 12 feet do not become apparant to
them until they're in the middle of the deep end at the pool.
15. For some reason, jumping off the side of the diving board doesn't seem
as threatening, although it's the same depth. This fact has yet to
sink in.