The Ten Commandments of Love


	I. I am thy Main Squeeze; thou shalt squeeze no others before me. 

	II. Thou shalt not take the name of they Squeeze in vain, nor 
		badmouth me behind my back.

	III. Remember our Anniversary, and keep it holy. Or else.

	IV. Honor MY mother and father. THINE are too damn weird.

	V. Thou shalt not kill my love by behaving tackily and making me
		embarrassed to be seen with thee.

	VI. Thou shalt not commit adultery, nor shalt thou even THINK about it 
		if thou knowest what's good for thee.

	VII. Thou shalt not steal from my purse/wallet while I am in thy 
		bathroom, nor use my credit cards, nor make long-distance calls 
		from my telephone.

	VIII. Thou shalt not talk about our personal problems to our friends.

	IX. Thou shalt not covet the higher market price of thy neighbor's house.

	X. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's Squeeze, nor son or daughter, nor
		stereo, nor BMW. 







Back to Lori's Humor Page